Derek Mackie: An ode to our new PM

To welcome our new Labour PM into office I’ve penned a few limericks which I hope will inspire him to do much, much better than his predecessor and indeed, himself, in his recent ministerial roles. 

 They reflect the shortcomings of the Ardern administration and his own failings in the important portfolios of Education, Police and as Covid Minister. 

They also represent my predictions of what he may do to improve his chances of re-election. 

 These odes, while seemingly harsh, are designed to challenge him to be a real Prime Minister and to govern fairly for all New Zealanders. 

 Come on, Chris! Make me eat my words. 

 There once was an MP called Chris 

 Reached number one on the Labour Party list 

 It may sound irrational 

 But he made Labour like National 

 Now there’s two Chris’ who can’t govern for piss! 

 Our top-ranking parliament member 

 Co-governance he swore to surrender 

 Sacked Nanaia and Willie 

 Said Three Waters was silly 

 But went back on his word in November 

 Our latest PM is called Chippy 

 His old boss was all talk but quite dippy 

 She was in charge for too long 

 Then she tanked and was gone 

 Let’s hope Chippy’s less dippy and lippy 

Derek Mackie is a geologist with a keen interest in current affairs.