And at Parliament House
Not an MP shit-stirring
Was as quiet as a mouse
Stetsons were hung up
Te Reo classes had ended
Three Waters recruitment on hold
5-year contracts suspended
Three years of hell over
Hope and sense had returned
Labour kicked into touch
The Left’s advances were spurned
Mainstream media were livid
Us plebs got it so wrong
Hell hath no fury
Like the press gallery scorned
A new era was dawning
In the life of our nation
Then Nicola opened the books
Revealing more debt and stagnation
Our old Finance Minister
Had fed us big fat fiscal lies
He’d scoffed all the lamingtons
And chugged down all the pies
Proud of his sabotage
In opposition he languished
A smug mountain of waste… but
Room for one more bacon sandwich
So much for Treasury forecasts
Not worth the price of the paper
In cahoots with Red Robbo
And the great socialist caper
Still, look on the bright side
NZTA’s made a comeback
Now the whole woke public service
Needs transformed or the sack
Another year almost over
Christmas Day nearly here
Things could always be better
Want Labour back? God, no fear!
So, give thanks for your presents
Even those that don’t fit ye
And hope Santa stops off
For a dump down Grant’s chimney
Have a Merry Xmas!
Derek Mackie is a former geologist with a keen interest in current affairs and a penchant for satire.
5 comments:
Perfect.
Dear Mr Mackie.
Sir, I am writing on behalf of The Climate Activist, Economic Survivability, and all other Bull Shit Committees, that have a lot to say, but rarely do anything constructive.
We are appalled that you would suggest, that "Dear Santa", would dare stop, over 'a chimney and down trou', just 'to deliver a message just to Grant R.'
Can we supply a list of other MP's that the same action could be applied too?
If you are happy with that approach, we will see if we can "bride Santa", we are thinking of "sponsoring" several crates (750 ml bottles) - of Lion Red, Lion Brown, Waitamata, Waikato, Tui, and the odd Speight's.
We think "that such stimulus" might help the "continuous flow, of the you know what", during the evening, of the 24th December.
Bless you Sir, yours
Ted. Sec Gen.
If you & Garrick Tremain could join forces, 'What A Wonderful World' (with due deference to Thiele & Weiss) we might enjoy on B-Views.
Thank You, Derek.
Your posts this year have been excellent.
Marry Christmas and Happy Holiday Season to you and family.
Doug
Brilliant Derek, another cracker for Xmas! (Pun intended)
The only wee change I'd perhaps suggest is the fourth stanza:
Mainstream media were livid
Us plebs had PIJF dawned
Hell hath no fury
Like the press gallery scorned
Merry Christmas to you and yours - do please keep them coming!
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