2025 edition: where your kid might get a morning prayer to Māori gods, your government job may come with a compulsory haka, and if you question any of it, you’re a racist. That’s the country we’re living in—where forced cultural rituals are the norm, not the exception, and where secularism is now just a dusty concept buried under a pile of race-based laws and bureaucratic guilt.
So here’s a little mission I’ve cooked up: Make New Zealand Secular. That’s right. No more institutionalised spiritual theatre, no more taxpayer-funded tribalism, and no more guilt-tripping the entire population into pretending we’re all spiritually connected to a goddamn tree because the Ministry of Ethnic Cosiness said so.