B: Indeed! Terrific, yes. I do love our little chats, Jacinda. And call me Boris, I insist.
J: Thank you Boris and best wishes to Carrie and the children. She’s such an inspiration with her eco activism and progressive ideas. I love to see young women modelling themselves on me…and Greta, of course.
J: And are you fully recovered now from Covid?
B: My doctors tell me I’m tickety-boo physically. But some of my colleagues and a large proportion of the electorate are questioning my mental faculties.
Carrie just tells me to ignore them and do what she says.
J: There speaks a wise woman.
I’m so impressed with your Net Zero agenda, even if COP26 was a terrible disappointment.
B: Nothing to do with me. I blame it on Glasgow, personally. Why pick a cold and wet place, in winter no less, to hold a conference on global warming. It’s very hard to get into the swing of it. That’s why I flew back to London in my private jet after a day.
J: But you chose Glasgow, didn’t you?
B: Oh, so I did! Now I remember. I thought it would appease The Sturgeon and distract her from demanding Scottish independence for a while. Instead the bloody natives went on strike and refused to pick up the rubbish.
It reminded me of my time at Eton, going on a school trip to Canterbury Cathedral and driving through Brixton on the way.
Oh, how the unpleasant half live!
