X: Premier Xi of ChinaT: Chris Trotskyer - a left-wing journalist
X: Please, take a seat Mr Trotskyer
T: This is a great honour, sir…your excellency…your magnificence.
X: Premier Xi is quite sufficient.
T: Thank you. I never thought in all my years as a committed left-wing, pro-communist journalist that I would ever be in the presence of one of my heroes of the revolution.
X: Come now, Mr Trotskyer, we are all equal under communism. May I call you Chris?
T: Please do. It is a privilege to be on first name terms with yourself….Xi.
X: Xi is my last name, Trotskyer! I thought you would have known that.
On second thoughts my official title will do.
T: Oh God…I mean Buddha. I’m so sorry. I’m just very nervous. I will, of course, use any title you wish and, just to be clear, I am a committed atheist, like yourself.
X: Enough! Let’s get down to business, as you westerners like to say.
My ambassador in New Zealand has recommended you as a suitable candidate to infiltrate and influence the weak and incompetent socialist government you have there.
We wish to undertake an experiment in spreading our glorious communist ideology throughout the West. But, we must not run before we can walk. So, we have decided to start small and use your country as a test before we move on to bigger and more valuable prizes.
Ultimately, we hope to destroy the great capitalist empire of the United States.
T: What a great day that would be. I am willing to help in any way I can.