Derek Mackie: Jacinda's new "progressive" Bill of Rights

Jacinda's diary  -  26 Sep 2022

My recent speech at the UN on the dangers of mis and disinformation was truly momentous. 

It shone a spotlight on the dire threat free speech and opinion poses - as “weapons of war” no less - to the safety and security of my New World Order. 

 It was received by my adoring fans with the same zeal and reverence as God bestowing the ten commandments on Moses. Or perhaps, more appropriately, Lenin presenting the Communist Manifesto to the Soviet Union’s General Assembly just after the Russian Revolution and the bloody, but necessary, assassination of the Tzar….and his imperial family. 

 In light of the effusive praise and positive feedback I received from virtually all the Western mainstream media, and my dear elite socialist colleagues, I’ve decided to lead by example and forge the way to a brighter, more inclusive neo-Marxist future by “modernising” the NZ Bill of Rights Act. 

 Clearly out of date and no longer relevant in a progressive “democracy”, changes are critical to ensure the State has far greater control over its citizens' everyday lives, choices and views for their own wellbeing and safety, and that of the planet 

 The following are proposed minor alterations to the Democratic and Civil Rights section of the Act which I will present to Cabinet and then, after a thorough consultation process, vote into law under urgency BEFORE the next election….if there is one! 

 This is simply too important to postpone, considering my current polling numbers, and for that reason there will sadly not be time for public feedback or a referendum on this issue. 

 I’m sure my fellow citizens will understand…or the media will anyway, and that’s all that really matters. 

Proposed additions are in red

Redundant phrases are scored through

                     Democratic and civil rights 

12 Electoral rights 

Every Selected New Zealand citizens - chosen by criteria defined by the elected government in office at the time this amendment is enacted - who is are of or over the age of 186 years— 

(a) has have the right to vote in genuine periodic elections - these can be postponed indefinitely in the event of a National Emergency, the definition of and the declaration of being the sole right of the government in office - which will be of members of the House of Representatives, which elections shall be by equal suffrage and (what nonsense, ay Willy?) by secret ballot; and 

(b) is are qualified for membership of the House of Representatives, subject to approval by BOTH the national office of the New Zealand Labour Party (or subsequent rebrands involving the term Aotearoa) and a majority vote by the elite council representing the iwi from that candidate’s home area, whether they identify as Maori or not. 

 13 Freedom of thought, conscience, and religion 

Everyone has the right to freedom of thought, conscience, religion, and belief, including the right to adopt and to hold opinions without interference which strictly adheres to the political and cultural agenda of the government in office. To protect society as a whole and the authority of the State, the full force of the law will be brought to bear against social deviants who refuse to conform.  

14 Freedom of expression (remove completely - no longer relevant)

Everyone has the right to freedom of expression, including the freedom to seek, receive, and impart information and opinions of any kind in any form. [note: may as well put Freedom to spread Mis and Disinformation - really!!!] 

15 Manifestation of religion and belief 

Every ethnic and gender minority group person has the right to manifest that group’s person’s religion or belief in worship, observance, practice, or teaching, either individually or in community with others, and either in public or in private, subject to pre-approval by the government in office. Approval can be rescinded at any time for no specific reason. 

16 Freedom of peaceful assembly 

Everyone has the right to freedom of peaceful assembly, after lengthy and stringent pre-approval by the government in office (applications must be made at least 12 months prior to peaceful assembly). Approval can be rescinded at any time for no specific reason. 

17 Freedom of association 

Everyone All members of the New Zealand Labour Party has have the right to freedom of association. All other citizens must obtain an approved Police vetting before associating with unapproved citizens, both in person and online. 

[note: considering the lengthy waiting list for Police firearms approvals, a new Approval to Associate Freely Department should be set up with the aspirational goal of processing applications within 12 months (more practically 24-36mths). Get Grant to budget for staff and offices] 

18 Freedom of movement 

(1) Everyone lawfully in New Zealand has the right to freedom of movement and residence in New Zealand, subject to the planned massive reduction in road building and maintenance, as recommended by the Climate Change Commission, which may make some routes unsafe to travel on.  This is part of Aotearoa’s commitment, enshrined in law, to attaining Net Carbon Zero by 2050. Cycleways will be a climate priority. 

(2) Every New Zealand citizen has the right to enter New Zealand, subject to the Government’s approval. In the event of a National Emergency, the definition of and the declaration of being the sole right of the government in office, this right can be suspended indefinitely and for no specific reason. 

(3) Everyone has the right to leave New Zealand, and those not supportive of the government in office will be actively encouraged and assisted to do so. 

(4) No one who is not a New Zealand citizen and who is lawfully in New Zealand shall be required to leave New Zealand except under a decision taken on grounds prescribed by law. In the event that a National Emergency is declared, ALL non-citizens can be instructed to leave, particularly if they are deemed to be a threat to national security by expressing criticism of the political and cultural agenda of the government in office. 

 And there we are. Some minor democratic tweaks that keep the population closely monitored and safely swaddled in the tight, all-encompassing embrace of the socialist State.  

Forever and ever..... Comrade. 

Derek Mackie is a geologist with a keen interest in current affairs.