Part 1 was posted on 1 May.
The Tale of Luxo’s Ring - Part 2
“I’m starving!” said Luxo Baggins.
“Oh, come on, Mr Luxo. We only had second-breakfast an hour ago.” replied Seemore.
“We’d have reached Mt Doom and be back in the Shire by now, if it wasn’t for all your stopping for snacks and drinks…and staring doe-eyed at that ring.
If you don’t mind me saying, you seem to have a problem with commitment.”
“Nonsense! I’m totally committed…more or less…. some of the time…. when it suits me.
I’m just hungry. You told me we had plenty of supplies but we’re almost out of food.
I’m eating for two, you know. Me and the pre….cious!”
“I’m a bit over the creepy voice, if you don’t mind. And, rings don’t need six meals a day, do they?
Your problem, Mr Luxo, is you’re a comfort eater. My cousin from Buckland is just the same. When you get worried or scared or insecure, you eat.
It’s a wonder you’re not as fat as a cave troll!”
“I'm a nervous wreck, that’s why! I can’t sleep. My mind never stops. That’s where all the energy goes. I wasn’t cut out for adventure but I can’t let Uncle Johno down, can I.
The responsibility of being a Baggins weighs heavily on me and I’m not sure I’ve got the fortitude for leadership. Making decisions is so draining.
The ring seems to be sapping my strength, too.”
“I can carry it for a bit, if you like. Give you a rest.”
“Absolutely not! The ring is mine. I’ll never relinquish it….until it’s time to destroy it, I mean.”
“But it’s controlling you, Mr Luxo. It’s taking advantage of your weak, compliant nature. You have to fight against it.”
“I hate to say it but you’re right, Seemore.
I’m inclined to defer to people - or rings - who forcibly express their will, even if I disagree with them or know their position to be false. I also have a tendency to apologise frequently, even when I’ve done nothing wrong. And, I’m ashamed to say, I sometimes abandon my friends when things get sticky.
Uncle Johno gets very cross and tells me to “grow a pair”. A pair of what, I’d like to know!”
“Balls! We’re down to our last two chestnuts.”
“You’re not even listening. We’re supposed to be best friends so your job is to be there for me to unburden myself.”
“Don’t I know it! It’s like carrying two loads of supplies instead of one.
Let’s have another look at that map, eh? We can’t be far from Mt Doom now.
There’s the Shire, see. We followed the Greenway, past Isengard, then we skirted the Dead Marshes.
The Black Gate of Mordor should be just across the river.”
“Look, there’s a boat coming.”
“Get down, Mr Luxo. Hide in the rushes.”
“Strange kind of boat. Very long and narrow. It’s being paddled by orcs.”
“It’s a waka! One came through the Shire once.
But that’s not just any waka. It’s The Dark Lady Nanaia’s waka. Do you see the name on the side? He Puapua. I believe it means “break them all” in Mordish.
Look, she’s sitting near the back.”
“Is that why the front’s lifting out of the water?
Aaah! It’s like putting the ring on again. At least I can close my eyes this time to shut out the horrible vision.”
“I’m sure we’re hidden but she’s staring right at us. Like she knows we’re here.”
“I can feel the ring pulling me towards her. It wants to go back to its mistress.”
“Get down, you great dollop! And here, give me that.”
“No, not the pre…cious!
We wants it, we needs it.”
“Terrible grammar, Mr Luxo. It’s I, not we. You should know that.
Now, you eat this last sandwich I’ve been saving for emergencies and let me look after your precious.
It’s your favourite kind.”
“Yummy! Cheese and pickle.
It’s all good. You keep the ring!”
“I knew I could rely on your lack of resolve….and your insatiable appetite.”
“The waka’s gone past. The Dark Lady turned away as soon as you took the ring from me. Thank, Gandalf!
But it’s hopeless. Did you see all those orcs? How are we going to get through the Black Gate into Mordor and then to Mt Doom?”
“That’s given me an idea.”
“No, Seemore, don’t put the ring on!
The Dark Lady will see you - and by that, I mean us.
Oh, great - he’s only gone and disappeared!”
“Don’t fret, Mr Luxo.
You see, I think the ring only works its evil on those who succumb to its will. If you don’t fear it and are firm in your beliefs it can’t control you.
I can slip it on my finger and disappear but there’s no horrible eye - with a strange squiggly pattern where a chin might be - threatening me. It’s quite soothing, actually.
Oh well, back to reality.”
“I’m very happy for you. But we still have to destroy it, don’t we?
Or….maybe we could keep the ring and take turns looking after it. It’s very powerful and could come in handy when I’m Mayor of Hobbiton….and you’re my deputy!”
“You’re exactly the kind of weak-willed, blow-with-the-wind creature the ring seeks out.
Sorry, Mr Luxo, but it has to be consumed by fire.”
“Thought you’d say that. I’ve no idea how we’ll do it, though.”
“That’s where I come in. I’ll simply put the ring on, go through the Black Gate, stroll up Mt Doom - it’s a lovely day for it - and throw it in. And nobody’ll see me.”
“Brilliant! And where will I be?”
“Here. Guarding the food, or what’s left of it. A vitally important job, Mr Luxo.”
“Well, yes. That’s right. It is, as you say, vital.
Some might suggest it’s just as important as destroying the ring, Seemore.”
“Might they? Just make sure you guard the food from yourself as well as any marauding orcs. I don’t want to come back and find no supper.”
“Hold on. My renowned thinking skills have kicked in and there’s a fatal flaw in your plan.”
“Pray tell, sir.”
“You’ll be invisible all the way to Mt Doom, but when you take the ring off and throw it into the fires everyone will see you. Then you’ll get eaten by orcs and I’ll be left on my own.
How will we - and by that, I mean I - get back home safely?
You didn’t consider that, did you?”
“That’s a very good point.
My thinking - and I realise it’s not on a par with yours - is that when the ring is destroyed The Dark Lady Nanaia will immediately sense its loss and all hell will break loose.
There’ll be orcs and all sorts of horrible creatures running around like headless chooks. Who’s going to pay attention to a small, inconspicuous hobbit?
If I use my natural cunning I should be able to escape.”
“Sounds very risky. I’m a naturally risk-averse hobbit. More of a disciple of the precautionary principle, actually.”
“Never mind all that fancy talk.
I’m off. Should be back by supper.”
3 hours later
“It’s getting so late and my tummy’s rumbling.
Should I wait for Seemore or have supper now? Big decisions.
What’s that noise?”
“It’s me, Mr Luxo. I’m back.”
“Are you alright? Is the…..precious gone?”
“Yep. Cast into the fires of Mt Doom, just like Uncle Johno instructed.”
“What about The Dark Lady?”
“As soon as I dropped the ring in, I heard this horrible wailing coming from the Black Tower. On and on it went. Then orcs started flying out the windows and general mayhem ensued.
I kept my head down and slowly made my way back.”
“I’ve never said this before, Seemore, but I wish I was a lot more like you.
Steadfast, unwavering in your beliefs, simple but decent all round, really.”
“Don’t know about that, Mr Luxo. But I appreciate it all the same, sir.
Truth be told, I’m not as open-minded to new ideas as I should be. Can be a bit set in my ways.
Nobody’s perfect, sir. Certainly not me.
Now, where’s supper?”
“You’ll be glad that I exercised restraint and have abstained since my emergency cheese-and-pickle sandwich.”
“Well done. Let’s eat and get on the road.”
“What will you do when you get back to the Shire?”
“Funny you should ask that. I was doing a lot of thinking on my walk up Mt Doom and - now, don’t laugh, sir - I’ve decided to stand for Mayor of Hobbiton.”
“But that’s ridiculous!
Sorry, I mean….that was the last thing I was expecting.”
“Now, I realise you're also running but I know that whoever wins, the other will fully support them. A sort of coalition, if you like.
I hope I haven’t taken the wind out of your sails, Mr Luxo.”
“Not at all. In fact, I’ve decided that being Mayor’s not for me.
I’d love to help with your campaign though. I am quite a good organiser.
Being born into an important family doesn’t make you a great leader. This adventure has taught me that, if nothing else.
Hopefully, Uncle Johno will understand.”
“I’m sure he will.
And even if he doesn’t, you stand your ground and show him you’ve grown a pair of those things he was harping on about.
See, I was listening after all.”
Derek Mackie is a geologist with a keen interest in current affairs.
1 comment:
I have heard that "our intrepid traveler's" may find difficulty on the road ahead - there is Á Minister, who is having second thoughts regarding the repair and/or replacement of the roads they may wish to travel down, and if they decide to travel across the land, then there is those 'rogue people' who bring the forests down (for wood) and leave every thing else behind , that becomes an issue for The Small Ones, to negotiate when they travel in that domain.
Plus the Masters at Mt Doom are thinking of "A Levy" (anincrease) on all the People in and around that domain. They require that Levy to pay for the "perks" of the Governing Council (being such a Gay Group) who have desire to spend ALL money on wasteful projects, such as second bridges across waters.
I am also surprised, that these two intrepid traveler's can eat, when those in the land(s) around them are facing hardship in paying for food themselves.
I do wish them well, and they must keep the Ring safe, from those who would wish to take it from them (I have heard they are known as The Ram Raiders), using all means available, as should they lose it, then the Authorities may not be able to help them, as they to are fixated on "other things"!
Travel well Luxo & Seemore.
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