Friday, August 19, 2022

Derek Mackie: World leaders in Au'te reo'motive Engineering!

Our polytechs are desperately trying to recruit AND retain students in the midst of a huge financial and restructuring crisis, presided over by our very own Labour government, whose zeal for centralisation comes second-only to turning New Zealand into an ethno-nationalist apartheid state.

 Described as a “national disgrace” by a former polytech chief executive, and a “shambles” by a national newspaper, Labour has once again over-promised and completely failed to deliver in the tertiary education sector, along with everything else it touches. 
 On top of all this, the woke brigade, who infect institutions like this, excel at wasting time and resources on Maoritising everything they can get away with, usually to accommodate a lone student who has grown up being told that entitlement is a badge of honour and should be exploited at every opportunity. 

 The following conversation could well take place in the very near future, if we don’t weed out our current generation of “progressive”, virtue-signalling administrators and public servants. 
This can only happen from the top down by electing a government that takes a stand against this ridiculous ethnic and gender minority hero-worship. And in particular, the idolisation and mystical elevation of all things Maori. 

Scene: The Automotive Engineering Stand at a local polytech’s Open Day in Christchurch. 
     L: Lecturer 
     P: Prospective student 

P: Hi, I’m interested in studying Automotive Engineering. 
L: Great. Have you applied anywhere else? 
P: No. I live in Christchurch and can’t afford to study away from home because everything costs so much these days. So I thought I’d enroll locally.

L: OK. Let me ask you a few questions first so we know you’re the right fit for our course. 
Why automotive engineering? 
P: My Dad’s a mechanic and he’s let me work on cars with him for years and I really enjoy it. 
L: Do you have your own car? 
P: Yeah, it’s an old banger but my Dad gets me parts and we fit them together. I’ve customised it a bit with spoilers and mags. 

L: Well, you’re certainly far more experienced, practically, than the average student we get. Just one last question. 

         Can you read Te Reo? 

P: No. Why? 
L: Well, it’s a bit embarrassing really. 
The Polytech’s Academic Quality Assurance Manager (AQAM) has instructed the department that all teaching materials and assessments must be produced in Te Reo only, from this year on. 

P: You’re joking, right? 
L: I wish I was, mate. 
It all started a couple of years ago with this one student who could read Te Reo. He complained that he was being discriminated against by having to use the English manuals and do exams in English. 
The Polytech was so eager to embrace any Maori request that we were told to translate everything and make it an option. Management couldn’t promote it fast enough, knowing they’d get plenty of positive media coverage. 
Mind you, the guy spoke and read English too, and seemed to have no problem surfing the internet on his phone and following Facebook and Twitter during class. 

P: But you have English manuals as well, yeah? 
L: We did…up until last year. 
Then two more Te Reo students joined the course, after seeing the media stories. They now make up half the students and demanded the Polytech recognise their right of co-governance, which management fell over themselves to agree to. 
Then the Maori students held a vote to make Te Reo materials and assessments compulsory. The result was split 50:50, for and against, as you can imagine. 
So they proposed that the AQAM should have the deciding vote, knowing full well she supported their views. The process and decision was sadly but predictably upheld by the Polytech. 

P: Hold on. You only have 6 students? 
L: Yep. Most hear about the language condition and don’t enrol, or sign up then drop out at the first assessment. 
It’s all paid for by the government so it’s the poor old taxpayer picking up the bill and getting nothing for it…as usual. I expect we’ll be down to three students very shortly. 
The class is already being heavily subsidised from other course revenues. The whole Polytech’s in a bad way financially and wouldn’t survive without large government subsidies. 
Serves them bloody right! 

P: My history’s not great but I’m sure that Maori didn’t have cars before the British arrived. 
How do you get all the technical words in Maori? 
L: Excellent question. There was a lot of discussion on this. We had endless meetings with Maori advisors from local iwi. I know - I had to attend some of them. The longest days of my life! 
Lunch was always provided, expenses reimbursed, and impressive hourly rates paid for the cultural advice. Funny thing was that each meeting typically ended with more questions than we’d started with. Requiring more meetings…. and more lunches. 

P: Sounds like you were being ripped off. 
L: You’re not wrong. 
After months of toing-and-froing, and hysterical suggestions like “kai-whare” for fuel tank, they finally decided that they would stick with all the English technical terms then write the mundane stuff in Maori. 
P: What a waste of time! 
L: They would've had to get the Maori Language Commission to approve all their own made-up words which would have taken months, if not years, and many, many lunches. 
The Polytech’s budget would have blown out even more than it has. 

P: Well, I’m afraid that rules me out. 
L: Along with about 98% of the population! 
P: I can’t afford to study anywhere else. The cost of rent and food is just too high. 
L: It’s criminal, mate. I feel for you. 
You’re probably the best prospective student I’ve talked to in years but you're excluded because you can’t read a language that most Maori can’t read…or even speak. 

P: Anyway, I don’t see your course lasting long if you can only attract people that read Te Reo. 
L: Which is why I’m planning on leaving as soon as I can get a job at a sensible polytech. That’s if there’s still such a thing! 
P: Got any advice? 
L: Go back and continue your studies with a real mechanic. You’ll learn a lot more from your Dad and won’t have to put up with all the woke bullshit that substitutes for learning these days. 

Derek Mackie is a geologist with a keen interest in current affairs.


Anonymous said...

Te reo is an official language. We should promote it at every opportunity and to encourage it's usage we should also be seeking that all Aotearoa Driver's Licences be examined in it. If not, we should at least make it an electable option and if such is to be so, to be culturally safe, it would be appropriate that a karakia should be performed before any such examinations?
No. Just kidding, but you're dead right Derek, it's time this bs was called out. Last time I heard, Te Pukenga were in for at $110M operating loss and here they are prepared to entertain this virtue signalling nonsense, all for one student! To bridge the deficit, they were talking of some redundancies, very easy to pick which one's should be first in line.

Mudbayripper said...

I wonder what the te reo equivalent of satire is. Bet there isn't one, no problem we can just make one up.
Understanding what it means could be though.

Ray S said...

Coming to a Polytech near you.

Anonymous said...

Did you realise that English is NOT an official language of New Zealand? Pretty scary, as this will encourage the idea of getting rid of it entirely - which does seem to be happening already - in all geographical names and names of Government departments, institutions and schools.